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Studio "A", this is master control.
You're up on router 7. Have a good show.
Will, show me Denver. And I need 15 points of sound on Kansas City.
- Denver's up. - Yes, it is. Give me Green Bay.
Stand by, Audio. Stand by, VTR.
- Georgia Dome's hot. - You're hot, Atlanta.
Somebody, Arrowhead, then back to Mile High... is that how it goes?
We're live here in 60 seconds.
Somebody? Anybody?
What do you need?
- Does Arrowhead... - Arrowhead bounces to Mile High.
Thank you.
Why'd you change that?
Just to mess with your head. Get me Judy at Oakland-Alameda.
When you get right down to it, what I'm saying is this, Case...
I think you should start getting out of your house.
- Dan, we're going to Arrowhead first, then Denver. - Got it.
Just out of your house.
I am out of my house.
I've been out of my house for six months.
I don't live at my house.
30 seconds to tape.
We're coming to the studio in 90 seconds.
Good evening.
- Isaac Jaffee's in the house, Natalie. - Yo.
We can make a feed on 43.
Just make sure the guys have the change.
Casey, did you get the change on Arrowhead and Denver?!
Natalie, if you shout into a microphone
when I'm wearing an earpiece, it poses the question.
"Is there a decibel level at which the human head will just,
you know, explode?"
Is he in a better mood than he was this morning,
or is this gonna be another crappy show?
Hey, Casey, Isaac wants to know if you're in a better mood...
Shut up.
Pretty crappy, yeah.
- Roll tape. - Good show, everybody.
Tonight on "Sports Night," we'll show you what comes up...
Dan, Casey, we're on you in 60 seconds.
Uh, excuse me.
Dan's got his hand raised.
Why are we quoting high-level sources
inside the Swiss Olympic Committee
on Helsinki's bid for the 2010 Olympics?
- What's the problem? - Helsinki's in Finland.
Really?
Yeah. Don't worry. I got it.
Are you sure?
Am I sure that Helsinki's in Finland?
Yeah. I'm quite sure.
I thought it was in Sweden.
It says "unnamed Swiss Olympic officials."
Graphics! Which is it, Sweden or Switzerland?
It's in Finland.
- Elliott, get something up on the Net! - What do you need?
We think Helsinki might be in Finland.
Yeah, we think there's a pretty good chance.
Coming in live in 15.
We'll change it on the teleprompter.
Cool. We can go out after the show.
You can stay at my place. Whatever you need. Whatever you need.
I'm getting a divorce. I don't need a cruise director.
Right.
My foul.
Forget I said anything.
In 5... 4...
3...2... 1.
Good evening, everybody.
From New York City, I'm Dan Rydell alongside Casey McCall.
Those stories and more, plus we'll take you live to the locker room at Arrowhead.
All that coming up after this.
You're watching "Sports Night" on CSC, so stick around.
We're out. Up in 60.
Yeah. Finland.
The national bird is the whooping swan.
- Thank you. - Thank you.
Columbia, 34, Colgate, 3. Who owes me money?
Thank you.
Oh!
Hey, Jason Grisham got arrested
in a strip bar in Houston last night.
That was only a matter of time.
Kim and Elliott are on it.
Kim, Elliott. Jason Grisham... what's up?
He shot 12-for-15 from the field,
and then he went to the Silver Key.
- It's a nude nightclub. - Topless only.
A guy called him something he didn't like, and Grisham hit him with a bottle of cognac.
- It was brandy. - It was cognac.
It was Courvoisier.
Courvoisier is cognac.
You get me the lawyer, you get me the agent, then get us Jason Grisham on the phone.
- We can't get Grisham on the phone. - Yes, you can.
- We are trying. - Try harder.
32 points. It was a career high.
Then he sends a guy to the hospital with 14 stitches.
Can you imagine if he'd had a lousy game?
You come in early?
I came in early.
You slept in the office?
- I came in early. - You came in yesterday.
Mom...
Have I told you about my New York renaissance?
Yeah. A lot. You've told me about your New York renaissance a lot.
Last night's show. What's up?
Grisham's free on bail, Casey slept in his office,
and I'm having a New York renaissance.
Cool. Rundown meeting's in five minutes.
I think the show's going to hell in a handbasket,
and I'm ready to fire the whole bunch of you.
Yes, but you won't 'cause we're all family here,
and I'm just like a daughter to you.
No, this is a television show here,
and you're very much like an employee to me.
I got to give Casey some slack, Isaac.
- Why? - Why do I have to give him some slack?
That's the question. If you can't tell me, I can't tell the network.
Isaac...
What, is there something going on between the two of you?
- Absolutely not. - Then why?
Because I owe it to him, that's why. We all do.
Now he's having some personal problems...
Oh, I know all about his problems.
You know, the network knows about his problems, too,
as a result of which, they become my problems.
And I'm saying that at the very most, I want them to be your problems.
- Got it. - Do you?
- Yes. - Good.
It's a genuine renaissance, Casey.
I have lived in New York my whole life.
This is the time I should be sick of it, but I'm not.
- 'Cause you're having a renaissance. - That's right.
- Really? - Yeah.
Nobody cares.
So how do we avoid these Helsinki mishaps in the future?
- We've been short-handed since Phil and Michael left. - Well, hire somebody.
Natalie's been interviewing people for an associate producer position,
and I'm meeting her finalists this afternoon.
You guys, he is so totally cute and intense
with a dark mystery about him that says,
"This is not a technician, this is an artist."
Well, before you hire him, can you make sure he can find Finland on a map?
You know what, Isaac? Maybe let that go.
You have Metropolitan Opera under the baton of Mr. James Levine.
- What is he talking about? - His New York renaissance.
- Want to hear about it? - No.
Good. Quickly, now... talk to me.
7 through 17. We got the whiparound with what?
Lambeau, 3Com, and Foxboro.
Casey's got Tampa Bay and the mighty Bengals of Cincinnati.
- What's in Cincinnati? - Well, the mighty Bengals, for one thing.
- They're gonna cut Santori. - The placekicker?
He's made eight field-goal attempts in three games
and has connected on a grand total of none of them.
- Oh, I've met him. He's a good guy. - Can't kick.
- He is a good guy. - Can't kick.
- He'll get picked up by another team. - No, he won't. You know why?
- Why? - 'Cause he can't kick.
All right, commercial one, then on to The Dugout Report...
I saw him kick in practice.
At this level, they pretty much want you to be able to kick in a game.
Moving on, from center ice...
I once kicked a 12-yard field goal in a gym class.
Well, then you should get yourself a tryout for the mighty Bengals of Cincinnati.
Excuse me. If anyone needs me, I'll be hurling myself out the window.
Plaza hotel, Oak Bar, dry martini.
New York at night, my friend. This city never sleeps.
Commercial 2, then on to segment 24.
Actually, I'd like to go back to 23 if nobody minds.
Any chance we could do it a little later?
- I want to move this along. - The network would like me to address this now.
J.J., Dana's the producer. We like to give her the impression she's in charge.
It's just that we're a little short on time.
- Segment 24... - I have some concerns about segment 23.
Is this you or the network?
In these meetings, Casey, mine is the voice of the network.
Wow, J.J.!
What are your concerns?
Who is Ntozake Nelson,
and why are you doing a 3-minute-and-20-second feature on him?
Natalie!
Ntozake Nelson's a South African distance runner... 15,000 meters.
As a schoolteacher in Jamestown, he led protests against the white majority.
That's swell, but, folks, I have...
- No, I... - Hey!
He was beaten up and thrown in jail.
His legs were broken, and the doctor said he'd never walk without a cane.
He's 41 years old, and guess what he's doing tonight.
It doesn't matter, 'cause I've already changed the channel.
He's running in the World Pacific Games,
an event this network is carrying live tonight at 9:00.
The Ntozake Nelson feature is promoting...
Look, I am all for you guys spotlighting our other programming.
But can't we find a good-looking 22-year-old American who might actually win?
Well, if you find him, send him over to my place, but in the meantime...
Look, I have a ratings book on my desk that's very instructive.
Now, it says that our key demographics, including 11-to 17-year-olds
who watch your morning rerun over breakfast, do not want to see features
about 41-year-old, politically oppressed Third World distance runners.
Now, they are instructing us, and I think it's a good idea to listen.
I've got Jason Grisham on the phone.
J.J., Danny and I have hosted shows
in the fifth- and third-largest markets in the country,
and we've received awards for journalistic excellence.
I'd prefer not to take my instructions from 11-year-olds.
And the next time you sit in our rundown meeting
and I hear the voice of the network come out of your mouth,
I'm gonna put my foot on your throat.
You ever ride the subway all day long,
I mean, just for the fun of it?
Natalie, Kim, Elliott, everybody else,
um, you want to step outside as well, please?
Go ahead.
I'd like to apologize for Casey's performance in these meetings lately.
Dana, I'm not concerned with Casey's performance in these meetings lately.
Well, I appreciate your understanding.
I'm concerned with Casey's performance on the air lately.
- What's your point? - My point is...
at the moment, Casey has less on-air charm and charisma
than my high school driving instructor, and you know it, Dan.
Now, I think the time has come
for you to think about the possibility of another partner.
I'm not gonna do the show with your high school driving instructor, J.J.,
if that's what you're asking me, okay, so...
Who will you do the show with?
I'll do the show with Casey.
You've got a very big future at this network, Dan...
My future is writing and anchoring a sports program with my partner, Casey McCall.
Now, if it's here, it's here. If it's not, it is someplace else.
For right now I'm gonna forget this conversation ever took place.
Dana, Isaac, you guys need me?
No. Thanks, Dan. You're done.
I really got to admire
the way you manhandled my staff this morning, J.J.
Look, Isaac, I have a specific...
Look...
don't take me on.
The network's not gonna wait forever.
It's your call, Dana.
But pretty soon, it's gonna be my call.
'Cause here's the thing...
I can't let it be their call.
Yeah.
They can put a Tonka truck on Mars and send me pictures,
but I can't get a decent satellite signal from Buenos Aires.
Excuse me. Ma'am?
That's probably because of a high-pressure system
building up around 32 degrees south latitude.
It'll blow by in two hours.
- There's weather in outer space? - Uh, no, ma'am.
But I think you're leasing time on the East Tech keyhole satellite,
and their signal gets cleared through a tracking station in Mexico City.
Yeah, but the point I'm making is that I can't...
Who... Who... Who is this?
I'm Jeremy Goodwin.
Oh, you're here for the associate producer job.
Yes, and let me just say that it is an extraordinary honor to even be asked...
- I'm not ready for you yet. - I'll sit right here.
32 degrees latitude.
- South latitude. - Ah. I get them mixed up.
Common mistake.
- Hey. - Casey.
Listen, I need you to take 30 seconds off the NFL injury report
and give it to me for the, uh, intro on ACC recruiting violations.
- Fine. - Thanks.
You're screwing up my show, Casey.
Keep the 30 seconds.
- That's not what I mean. - I know. I was joking.
- I know you were joking. - Yeah, I could tell by the way you didn't laugh at all when I said it.
That's 'cause I'm mad at you and also, it wasn't that funny.
Dana, did you come in here to give me a pep talk?
'Cause if you came in here to give me a pep talk,
can we assume that it already happened, that it worked, and that I'm peppy?
Casey, sit down.
Now, I know you think that there are 250 other people in this business.
- No, I don't think there are 250 other people... - ...who could produce this show.
- ...who can produce this show. - Yes, you do, and whether you're right or whether you're wrong,
I'm the one that has the job, and I love it.
I love producing "Sports Night".
I live from eleven to midnight. And the rush is so huge...
I don't come down till 3:00 in the morning.
I love doing "Sports Night," and you used to, too.
Now, I came in to tell you that it looks like.
Cleveland's gonna go to a four-man rotation for the stretch drive,
I came in to tell you that it looks like
segments 16 through 21 might have to get condensed
for a possible story coming out of South Bend,
but mostly I came in to tell you...
you are screwing up my show.
- Natalie! - Yo!
Let's meet with your guy.
Jeremy, this is Dana Whitaker.
- We've met. - Yes.
You have an impressive résumé. Let me ask you some questions.
- You look nervous. - I'm okay.
- Would you like a glass of water? - Uh, no, thank you.
A soft drink? We have Fresca.
If you're taking orders, I'll have the angel-hair pasta and a nice merlot.
- I'm just... I'm just trying to make him comfortable. - Can we interview the man?
I know. A little professionalism is all I'm saying.
- I could come back later. - What are your favorite sports?
Uh, beg your pardon.
- Where are you strongest? - Oh, football.
- Great. Let's talk about basketball. - I said football.
I heard you. Let's talk about basketball.
Uh, we could talk about baseball or hockey.
Oh, you're pretty strong in baseball and hockey, are you?
- Not as strong as football, but... - Good. Let's talk about the Knicks.
I walked right into that one, didn't I?
Well, I left the door wide open for you.
- Shot of bourbon? - Please.
Sit.
I'm sorry. That was harsh. I hurt your feelings.
Name three things the Knicks need to do this season
to make it to the finals.
Um, I couldn't get another question?
You will, but not till I hear an answer to the first one.
What do the Knicks...
Three things the Knicks need to do to contend.
Ms. Whitaker...
I would be great at this job.
You've got to believe me when I tell you I've been training my whole life for it.
I've crunched stats, I've broken down film,
and there wasn't a team at my high school that didn't have me for an equipment manager.
I have read every box score in every newspaper
that's printed in English and has a sports section,
and I have seen "Sports Night" every night since your first broadcast,
two years, two months, and a week ago today.
Now, yes, sure, indeed.
I can tell you what Ewing and Oakley are shooting from the field
and that you're not gonna stop John Starks if he squares up to the basket,
and put any defensive pressure on Charlie Ward, he's gonna fold like a cheap card table,
but if you're asking me for genuinely sophisticated analyses...
and I sense that you are...
you gotta give me some time...
at least 20 minutes.
- Did that make any sense? - I wasn't really listening.
- Oh, God! It's just... - Jeremy, Jeremy... this is television. Things happen.
If you want to work here, you've got to not spontaneously wig out.
Right. Right.
The Knicks.
Name three things.
- Improve their free-throw percentage. - Yes.
- Run the floor. - Okay. One more.
Tell Spike Lee to sit down and shut up?
- Excellent! - Well, welcome to "Sports Night."
"Dale Earnhardt, Jeff Gordon, and Rusty Wallace
"were just a few of the big-name drivers NASCAR had on hand yesterday
- at the Darlington Motor Speedway..." - "yesterday", "Speedway"?
What's the problem?
You don't want the rhyme.
You got to put "yesterday" in the second sentence.
"Just a few of the big-name drivers NASCAR had on hand
"at the Darlington Motor Speedway.
The press event, held yesterday to announce that..."
Hey, we have to talk.
What's up?
Well, I've been thinking about this for a while.
I mean, I want you to know that I've given this some thought.
I think "yesterday" has got to go in the first sentence. I'll tell you why.
I'm thinking about leaving the show.
For how long?
I've been thinking about it for a while now.
No, I didn't ask you how long you were thinking about leaving the show.
I asked you how long you were thinking about leaving the show for.
For good.
Did you get an offer?
No, I didn't get an offer, Danny. I'm not... I'm not going to another show.
I'm talking about getting out of sports.
- Why? - Look, I'm just tired of it.
- All right? - You're tired of what?
"But first this...
"Sacramento power forward Jason Grisham was released
by a judge in Houston this morning after posting a $5,000 bond."
Which, by the way, he paid in cash he happened to have in his pocket.
So Jason Grisham's a jackass. You know Jason Grisham.
Look, I got into this 'cause I like getting people to like sports.
And I've turned into a PR man for punks and thugs.
Now any atrocity, no matter how ridiculous or hideous or childish...
it doesn't matter... I make it sports.
10-cent bagman whacks a skater's leg with a crowbar... that's sports.
Second-round draft pick gets cranky in a Houston bar, and that's sports.
And let's not forget the mother of all great sports stories...
a double homicide in Brentwood.
If you want to talk, I'm all for it.
Really, I am. But let's talk about what you need to talk about, okay?
The moral decay in American sports isn't the problem here, all right?
Look, it is the problem.
I... Look, I have a 7-year-old son
that I get to see on Wednesdays
and alternate weekends, and these are his heroes.
And now, six days a week, they're also his male role models.
Well, quitting your job ought to do the trick.
- Look, Danny, I know I'm leaving you in the lurch... - No, I mean it.
You should definitely quit your job, because that way, sports will be good again. Yeah.
A-Also, your wife, she'll take you back,
and you can be a role model for your son, knowing as we do how...
how women and children, you know, admire the bitter and the unemployed.
- Are you mental? - I'll see you at airtime.
Yeah, one thing you definitely don't want to do is talk to your friends.
You know, I wouldn't do that.
Hey, I know you're pissed, and that's fine,
but canning the sarcasm wouldn't be out of line.
"Fine" and "line" rhymed. I'd move "fine" to the second sentence.
Danny, you're gonna find another partner.
Anybody would kill to do this show with you.
I've been here every day, Casey...
every day... and I have kept my mouth shut
because that's what you asked me to do.
But if you'd have asked me,
I'd have told you that Lisa is an angry, unhappy, punishing woman,
and in 10 years there's never been a single moment
that has suggested to me she has any affection for you at all.
And I have no patience for people like that.
Now, the people here, they like you...
Isaac, Natalie, Kim, Elliott.
I don't know who this new guy, Jeremy, is, but he seems to like you just fine.
Have you even noticed that Dana's been keeping.
J.J. and the network away from you with a whip and a chair, huh?
Have you noticed that she's been risking her job for you every day?
And do you really think, my friend, it has that much to do with your talent?
These are people who like you, okay,
- Guys... - and know what you've been going through,
and for three months now, you have shown us nothing but the back of your hand, -Guys...
and now you're gonna show us the door?
Well, excuse me, all right,
but the wisdom of your decision isn't entirely clear to me here.
- Okay? Yeah, I'm pissed. - Excuse me. Fellas...
And you know what? I'm tired of it.
- Dan! Casey! - What?!
There's something going on you're gonna want to see. Come on!
Hey.
Hey, what's going on?
Check it out.
Oh, we need audio! Yo!
That time can't be right. Danny. Danny...
Danny, can that time be right?
...absolutely crazy!
With 900 meters left, at 41 years old,
Ntozake Nelson is on a pace to absolutely shatter the world record!
Go ahead on, old man.
Is he gonna do this?
- Does it look like he's planning on slowing down? - Come on.
- Bring it. - Bring it on.
Come on! Move it!
Go! Come on!
Go!
Go! Go! Go! Go! Go!
Go! Go! Go! Go! Go! Go! Go! Go! Go! Go!
Lisa! Lisa, Lisa, it's me!
Listen, I need you to do something for me. I'm sorry.
I need you to wake up Charlie and give him the phone for a second.
B-Because I need you to!
Charlie!
I-It's dad. Hey, uh, did you finish all your homework?
Good. Turn on your TV. Turn to my channel.
I want you to watch this.
This guy's name is Ntozake Nelson.
Now, look, I'll call you tomorrow. I'll tell you all about it.
But for now, you just watch him run.
'Cause he's not doing much.
He's just running faster than any man's ever run before.
I'm gonna be on the air in about 12 minutes,
and if Mom says it's okay, you can watch the beginning of the show.
Then I'm gonna give you the special signal.
That means you got to turn off your TV and go to sleep.
I love you, too, Charlie.
Listen up. They're gonna bounce to us for a 15-second promo at the end of the race.
Natalie, get the first team in the studio.
Elliott, Kim, let's go.
I need graphics!
- We need Casey. - Okay. Got it.
I'll take care of him.
You okay?
Absolutely.
Get to work.
Absolutely.
It's a 15-second teaser, Dan. You need copy?
- Is the opening Lakers/Sonics? - Lakers/Sonics, Pistons/Heat.
- I'll take it. - You want it?
It's not that my teasers are better than yours, Danny,
it's just that yours are vastly inferior to mine.
I'm new here, so, uh, if I'm in your way, you just let me know.
No problem.
- Daniel. - What?
You were right. I was wrong. It won't happen again.
15 seconds.
You want to do something tonight after the show?
Yeah. You know, I was gonna ride the Staten Island
Ferry for a while, eat a hot dog. You want to come?
Yeah, absolutely, and I'll tell you why.
'Cause it's 17 degrees outside with the windchill,
so what I want to do is stand in a boat
in the middle of New York Harbor at half-past midnight.
- You have a better idea? - Well, we could go to a bar,
find some people we don't like, and beat the crap out of them.
Heads up.
In 3... 2... 1.
I'm Casey McCall alongside Dan Rydell.
Lakers/Sonics, Pistons/Heat, and guess what.
Ntozake Nelson's got something to say about a world record.
Seeing is believing, so stick around for "Sports Night,"
- coming at the top of the hour. - He's back.
You'll be glad you did.
We're out.
We're up in nine minutes.
Dana, could you come here for a second?
Do you have any idea how to spell Ntozake?
- What do you want? - I want you to come here.
What?
No one... can produce this show but you.
You... have nine minutes.
Somebody get him a new shirt.
What's wrong with my shirt?
You got my mascara on your collar.
- Natalie? - Yeah.
Get somebody on the phone.
I want to make sure there aren't going to be any mistakes.
I'm nervous about the satellite feed from Buenos Aires.
Sure.
- Natalie? - Yeah.
- Argentina. - Right.
Natalie!
Um... double-check that.
You know what? Here's something I don't understand about rugby.
Oh, you do understand something about rugby?
I've played rugby, all right? Now, I want to ask you...
Wait. Wait. W-When have you played rugby before?
When I was in college I played... coed rugby.
You did not play rugby.
I played rugby. I want to ask you a question...